You're a Mean One, 2008

Have a Happy New Year and in the spirit of "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" I'll present "You're a Mean One, 2008" (2008 replaces Mr Grinch in all lyrics) - actually this is one mean spirited song when you consider the 'Leave it to Beaver/Donna Reed' type times (1950s) :)



You're a mean one, 2008.
You really are a heel.
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel. 2008.

You're a bad banana
With a greasy black peel.

You're a monster, 2008.
Your heart's an empty hole.
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got garlic in your soul. 2008.

I wouldn't touch you, with a
thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole.

You're a vile one, 2008.
You have termites in your smile.
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile. 2008.

Given the choice between the two of you
I'd take the seasick crocodile.

You're a foul one, 2008.
You're a nasty, wasty skunk.
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk. 2008.

The three words that best describe you,
are as follows, and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk."

You're a rotter, 2008.
You're the king of sinful sots.
Your heart's a dead tomato splotched
With moldy purple spots, 2008.

Your soul is an appalling dump heap, overflowing
with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable
rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots.

You nauseate me, 2008.
With a nauseaus super-naus.
You're a crooked jerky jockey
And you drive a crooked horse. 2008.

You're a three decker sauerkraut and toadstool
sandwich
With arsenic sauce.